'GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS' - Post 4 - Where there is faith............

As a people, we are very ambitious and this is good, there is however a downside to this. We can lose
our selves in pursuing self-advancement; a bigger degree for that bigger salary, a bigger house, a newer car, and find ourselves wondering, why am I not happy, why does my life feel so dull. The thing is, we forget to be thankful for the little things that we already have, without which, our lives would not mean much. Our relationships, our health, our faith, our freedom, I could go on.

There are times in my life when I feel I could have achieved more in certain areas, and as a result I beat upon myself and take on a 'woe is me' attitude. Thankfully, I am soon reminded that less I be accused of being ungrateful, I do have things to be thankful for. 

In my pursuit to become a more thankful and happier person, in general then, I am urged to add a new posting feature to my blog, a segment dedicated to being thankful, which I have decided to call ‘GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS', where I will post all the things in my life that I am thankful for, regardless of how small and especially those things which I have learnt the most from.

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Post 4 - Where there is faith

Let me first apologize for last week's grateful Wednesday post. I was in over my head that day and could not honour my obligation. So sorry.

Today I am grateful for my faith.

In Hebrews 11 verse 1 (KJV), faith is defined as the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen and Microsoft Word Thesaurus defined faith with words such as, confidence, assurance and conviction.

It is not easy to keep hope alive, when everything else is dictating to you to give up, throw in the towel. This was the case for me with my infertility struggles. I tested my faith over and over again throughout this decade long struggle, and many times gave up in my physical self as no answer was forthcoming. I many times found myself calling out to God, are you there? Its me, Marie, do you remember the many prayers of a stammer, freckled face girl, who so desperately wants to be a Mother.

I did not give up, my faith would not let me, as I had the conviction that my answer would come one day. After all, I did test my faith in other areas of my life and it worked, so I believed this instance had no reason to be different, so much so that somewhere around 2004/2005, I went as far as designing the invitation for a Christening Brunch I wanted to have when my child was being christened, you get the picture, and guess what, I did use it for my son’s christening in December 2007.

I somehow knew though, especially when my struggles intensified, that I was certainly experiencing some refining fire. I was not the person God intended me to be and so I was being tested, prodded and molded and would come out as good gold.

My faith won out, be it all of a decade long, and now I am having it a little easier putting my faith to work in other areas of my life. Thanks be to God.

Let me encourage you in your struggles then, to put your faith to work. We are all equipped with just the right amount of faith that we need to overcome our circumstances. Hold on even tighter when those feelings to give up come knawing at your heart strings. The saying goes, "when you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on. Remember too that the darkest hour of the night is just before dawn.

BE ENCOURAGED THEREFORE

LIGHT MOMENT FRIDAYS - FEATURE 38 - Emergency Room Humour

Emergency Room Humour

A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room took the husband aside and said, "I don't like the looks of your wife at all."

"Me neither, Doc," said the husband. "But she's a great cook and really good with the kids."

Source: Sustain Jamaica Sunday Humour

              Like them on facebook:  http://www.facebook.com/sustain.jamaica

10 YEAR OLD COLUMBIAN GIRL GIVES BIRTH

A 10 year old Columbian girl gave birth to a baby girl weighing just about 5 pounds recently. This makes her one of the world’s youngest mother.

I really did not know this was even possible but according to an ABC article, the explanation is that, because ovulation usually starts before menstruation, it is very possible that girls can get pregnant before having their first period.

Follow the link below for more on this story:-

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/health/2012/04/06/10-year-old-girl-gives-birth-to-daughter/

Many times throughout my infertility struggle, I would think that if I had become pregnant earlier, not at age 10 by any means, but in my early teens as I began noticing evidence of my PCOS condition in my late teens, then I would have had the child or children I so wanted and my infertility struggle would have sure turned out differently.

Not that my parents would approve of this and I would definitely have to fit all my belongings in one travelling bag and run for the hills.

post image by: http://www.thelifefiles.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/wayuu.jpg

“PROMISES, PROMISES”

Yesterday, in my daily devotional reading, the author was talking about promises. Have you ever been disappointed by someone who had promised you something?

A lot of us have claimed promises from God and wonder from time to time if he has forgotten about us and begin to feel abandoned and disillusioned. We do not understand many times how God works, but from my experience with waiting on him, I have surmised that that he makes us wait so that we can come to a place of total dependence on him, when our efforts to take matters into our own hands fail, because we do try and  they always somehow does not work out. I believe this wait is part of his divine preparation process for us as well, to be mature spiritually and otherwise to receive these promises.

The author went on to focus on Abraham and Sarah, most of us know that they were not able to have children and Abraham had been promised by God that he would make him the father of many nations. Well, that promise took a very long while, 25 years to be exact (Gen. 21 v 5).

I too had claimed God’s promise to make me a mother and my wait took over a decade. Did I wait patiently on God’s promise? Quite the contrary. I was conflicted within, became even angry at God at times and even attempted to take matters in my own hand by exploring Invitro Fertilization (IVF) and adoption. (Gen.15 v 2) accounts that Abraham did not wait patiently either, he questioned God about his childlessness and even went as far as fathering a child through one of Sarah’s handmaiden (16 v 15).

Is any of you currently in the position myself or Abraham and Sarah was in. Well, we are proof that God does fulfil his promises. You might be in the waiting process and is conflicted, disillusioned and growing impatient, take heart and be encouraged by our stories.

image by: http://www.healthymale.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/infertile-couple.jpg

HONOUR FOR CAYLEE

I guess by now, most of us have invested in this ongoing trial involving a mother, Casey Anthony who was being tried for the murder of her daughter, Caylee, who went missing and was later found dead, in the summer, about three years ago.

I must say, I was one of those who was somewhat upset when she was found innocent of murder, two days ago and only felt better after hearing her Prosecutor said, “If you are going to understand the legal system any at all, you must understand also, that sometimes, things just won’t go to the way you expect them to.” Also, the evidences could not lead to a murder conviction.

As I watch bits and pieces of this trial over the past weeks, I could not help my anger. Everyone was so busy trying to clear themselves of being connected in any way to this tragic death, lying if they have to, and all this time, I could not believe the different stories that came about. Why was no one thinking about Caylee. Of all the persons who gave testimonies, family and otherwise, someone must know something about this innocent child’s death, whether it be accident or otherwise. Why then is no one moved to honour this child’s memory by being direct and truthful about what really happened. She deserves closure and deserves to rest in peace.

I have heard that her mother was nineteen years old when she was born and the pregnancy was unwanted, but after watching footage of mother and daughter enjoying playtime, everyone can conclude that she seems wanted and loved. Why then would her mother wait a month before reporting her missing. If my child was missing, I would probably report it even before the required time had elapsed (48 hours as I understand it). Most of all though, why would she lie to the authorities when being questioned, when she is a mother and is expected to love and most of all be the protector of any child entrusted to her?

I was further upset when I see all the hugs and congratulations that Casey received after being proven innocent. I don’t know that I would want to be congratulated like that if I was in her position, because, in my opinion, no one should feel like a winner here, Caylee is still dead and it seem we are still nowhere closer in knowing how she died and her mother lied to the authorities to protect herself.

I understand that there are a lot outraged people out there because of the outcome of this trial and I can very much see why. Barring the part the legal system played, there are a lot odd outcome from this trial. Caylee was two when she died and I remember being so protective of my son at that age. Why were those who should have been protecting her seemingly not around  to protect her from her demise, when she needed them most. I know the defense theory is that she drowned accidentally in the family pool and accidents like that happens from time to time, but given the dynamics of this case, this is hard to digest.

I really hope this case will eventually have closure and Caylee will receive the honour she deserves.

 image by: http://news.yahoo.com/jurors-cried-felt-sick-acquitting-anthony-012228871.html

WHO IS A MOTHER

image by: http://studyinromania.files

The English Thesaurus (United Kingdom), describes a mother with the following phrases/terms, look after, care for, protect, nurse, tend.

A mother then, is a very broad term used to describe more than just women who have given  birth to children of their own. The Godmother, the Foster Mother, the Adopted Mother, the sister with no biological children of her own, but find herself caring for her siblings children, even the friend, who for some reason or another find herself caring for the children of a very good friend.

Not to be forgotten are the Mothers of some precious little angels in heaven. May 1 was International baby lost Mother’s Day and I want to do my little bit in acknowledging these special Mothers, as I believe that a woman becomes a mother from the moment it is confirmed that she is pregnant, because from that moment on bonding between mother and child begins.  The only different is, her children are not physically with her here on earth, they are in heaven with God, waiting for that great reunion. I am privileged to be a mother of one of these little angels and I cannot wait for the moment when we will be reunited.

This Mother’s Day, I want to acknowledge and honour ALL mothers. May you find joy and most of all a greater purpose in what you do. May you never grow weary in well-doing and not get too caught up in seeking earthly appreciation, but know that your reward is in heaven.

May everyday be an opportunity to learn and to impart knowledge and may you grow in grace, patience and virtue.

HAPPY  MOTHER’S  DAY

  

N.B. If you want to know more about International baby lost Mother’s Day, please check out the following link

http://internationalbabylostmothersday.blogspot.com/

I DID NOT EVEN WANT CHILDREN

The Today Show on NBC featured Reiko Rizzuto recently, a woman who left her family which includes two young children to study in Japan for six months.

While in Japan, she realizes that she did not want to be married anymore, and neither does she want to be a full time Mom and did not even wanted children. She said she had completely lost herself in playing the roles of wife and mother and now wants to take time to be true to herself.

Upon returning after her studies, she filed for divorce and secured a home near enough to her children where she now finds more satisfaction being a part-time mom. “The time my children and I spend together these days, is more quality time,”  she says.

As I sat there and reflect on this story, I wonder if any woman who have ever struggled with infertility, would find themselves in this position. I know that I would probably never find myself in this position because I always wanted children and yearned so much over the years to have even one and I know other women who struggled like me, would probably agree with my position. I am also what I would call a natural caregiver and likes taking care of people, because this is where I find a big part of my fulfilment.

Having said this, I can see where a woman could find themself  in this position,  because being a wife and mother is totally consuming as you are always looking out for the wellbeing of your family, with none or little time to  focus on your wellbeing, and as a result of this harsh reality, many women find themselves with such beautiful families, but sadly, they are not able to enjoy the fruits of their labour because they are fighting fatigue, unhappiness and eventually unfulfillment.

Let me know your thoughts in this regard.

See interview on NBC and excerpt from her memoir, entitled 'Hiroshima in the Morning'

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/41872847/ns/today-books/

If you are interested in this story, her book can be purchased directly, below.

'ITS NOT OVER UNTIL ITS OVER'

image by: http://www.opposingviews.com

Actress, Christina Applegate, who had her breakout role in the sitcom married with children, (1987), gave birth to a daughter on January 2007, after being diagnosed with breast cancer and subsequently having a double masectomy.

I am sharing this news just to encourage some of us who think that because of our circumstances, some of our dreams will never be realiazed.

Christina could have just resigned herself to not becoming a mother, because she was indeed discouraged by her doctors.

Take courage therefore, because ‘its not over until its over.’

Read complete story:-

http://www.opposingviews.com/i/christina-applegate-shares-joy-of-having-baby-after-cancer

IF I HAD IT MY WAY, ALL WOMEN WOULD BE HONORED ON MOTHER’S DAY.

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

I had a great Mother’s Day weekend and I hope you had a great one too. Thanks to my Church, the two men in my life and my friends and family, who sent me kind Mothers’ Day wishes.

At Church on Sunday, when the mothers were called to the front of the congregation to be honored, as is customary, on Mother’s Day, I made a conscious effort to scan the audience to see the faces of the women still sitting there, who are obviously not mothers. I studied their faces, and as I did that, the emptiness, the void I felt for over a decade, when I was sadly, one of those women who had no choice but to remain in the audience, came flooding in.

As the faces of those women differ, I would imagine that the circumstances which led them to be in this position, also differ as well. Their faces somehow, did not convey that they were comfortable sitting there, and I just could not help it, I felt sadness for them.

I was so relieved when the children, after presenting us with our tokens, scattered in the audience and presented those women with tokens as well. I saw one woman remarked, ‘for me’ and took the token with such gratitude. My heart felt at peace, and I thought, this is the way it should be. All women should be honored on mother’s day, whether they are biological mothers are not, because I am almost sure, that at some point in their lives, they must have found themselves acting in this capacity and even if this is not the case for all, for even the mere fact that as women, we do possess this big heart to love and to nurture as only a woman can.

Just thought I would share this.

HAVE A BLESSED DAY.

MY MOTHER, MY HERO

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

When I started thinking about what to write for Mother’s Day on my blog this year, before long, I knew I wanted to do a tribute to you, my mother, my hero.


You are my hero because despite being thrown hurdles in life, you have made it over these hurdles with such, humility, such grace and most of all, a heart filled with gratitude. I often think back at how thankful you were, even with the little you had, and I was reminded of this in a birthday call I made to you recently. You were on your way to work that evening and said you had another shift in the morning, I said to you, mind you are working too hard at your age, and you said, ‘yes, it is tough, but I remain grateful to God, because others still have it worst.’ This certainly warmed my heart and for the days following this conversation, I was made to focus more on having a thankful heart and giving God thanks more, for the blessings I do have in my life. Thanks Mama.

You and Papa, even though you had such limited education, made sure that all your children were exposed to, if only, the basic education that we needed to make sure we had, even if it is just a little bit more than you had. You did this despite the critics, who were accusing you of putting your children first, instead of seeking to acquire material things that would enhance your life. You did not allow these comments to cause you to lose focus, because your status in life was not what matters most to you and so your eyes remained on the prize and now you are enjoying the best of both worlds. You are proud of what your children have become, be it great or small and you have been blessed with more to the point where you can now give us some of what you were not able to give us before, and most of all, you are also able to stretch a hand a little further to others in need as well. This is just a testament to the fact that God does honor humility, faithfulness and a thankful heart.

I am sadden to know that the individuals who were saying these things to you, seemingly had no idea, the strength of character and focus, that it takes to be a parent who wants the very best for their children, even with limited resources. I must say, now that I am a parent myself, I totally understand what it takes to put your child first. Someone, in a conversation, once said to me that if she is reduced to only a morsel of food in her house, that morsel would have to share for all in her household. I am totally taken by this concept, but what if the morsel just cannot share and I know you and Papa must have found yourselves doing without, because there were times, when the morsel you had, just could not share. There were times I recall, though, when God blessed and multiplied that morsel, so that even the dear old neighbor, did not have to do without.

I have hurdles in my life, and many times when I feel like I have no strength left to make it over these hurdles, I suddenly feel renewed thinking, wait, my mother is scaling her hurdles, even if she is stumbling or even falling here and there, so I know I should be able to make it over mine as well, though I too may stumble and sometimes even fall. I remember when I was allowing my hurdles to get the better of me, you sent some harsh words my way. I was upset at first, and thought, my mother does not really love me. Before long though, I saw all too clear, your intentions. You were using tough love to help me snap out of my pain, because you just could not deal with the fact that one of your children, was hurting so deeply, especially after knowing you had provided us with the basic platform (a basic education, and some basic and very important life skills, and most of all, the fact that we knew God, because of the example you and Papa set), to be able to deal with the darts that life would throw our way.

As a child growing up, we did not always see eye to eye, but this is normal and among one of the things that often happen when we are on the learning curve of life. A child, in their quest for individualism and acceptance in this big wide world, very often find themselves struggling to find common ground with their parents or guardian, and so I do believe this is a  critical part of the process of growth and transition into the adult that the child will one day become.

Now that I am an adult, who have to come to terms with the fact that one particular hurdle, (my stuttering), that I have been given, will continue to make my life a little more difficult than that of others, I often look back and think that probably if I was given more, by way of validation from my parents, so that I did not spend a lot of my young impressionable years thinking that I was less of a person, because of this hurdle, I would be at a much better place in my life now. I however do not blame you and Papa for any contribution to such difficulties, because I know you did not have the capacity to deal with issues of this nature, instead, I choose to press on, knowing that I am by no means the only one with hurdles, drawing on those basic life skills you gave me, and others that I continue to learn along the way, and hoping one day to be truly liberated in this regard. Mama, what you and Papa gave me is just as important, or even more important, though, you taught me how to be humble, how to be thankful and make the most of what I have been blessed with be it big or small, and most of all, how to live my life with grace and humility.

Your heart is so big and I do believe that all your children share equal parts of this big heart of yours, because a mother would not have it any other way. Your prayers, I know, are what keep us together, and I remember listening to your prayer one night before falling asleep and thinking to myself, what big heart, you covered everyone in that prayer, even those who govern our land, and then I knew, your children really have someone in their corner, and we are all truly blessed.

You have regrets for some choices you made while raising us, as I once heard you said that if you had your life to live over, you would have done some things differently. This is quite normal for each and every one of us, because we are not given a life manual, so we are prone to making mistakes and so all we can do is learn from these mistakes, forgive ourselves and hope that those who were marginalized as a result of our choices, forgive us as well, so that we all can continue together (in unity), on this journey of life.

And so, this Mother’s Day, I just want to honor you for all you have been, all you have become and all you continue to be to me.

I love you, mama, my hero.



HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY

MY FIRST BABY

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand
Psalm 127: 3 & 4

Yes, I had a baby before I had my son, he was a ‘fur-baby,’ an adorable German Shepherd pup called Diego, named after the football hero, Diego Maradona. He was my baby, but technically not mine. He belonged to my brother-in- law and I was chosen to be his pup-sitter for the first few weeks of his life, because he had to be taken from his mother.

That bond is one that I can never forget as I was in the most difficult period of my struggle with infertility and he showed up at a time when I needed a distraction from what I was going through. I needed to release some of the love that was building up inside of me for my own baby, a love that was becoming frustrated, as it was waiting too long to be released on a deserving baby.

Diego gave me a reason to wake up every morning for those few weeks as I was so anxious to see him, to care for him as any mother would care for their own baby. You could not help but fall in love with him because he was so cute and after my neighbor met him, she too fell in love and came by each morning just to see him before she went off to work.

Diego soon grew into a little dog who thought he was big enough to do big dog things. I remember one day I was in the kitchen preparing his lunch and there he was trying to sit up like a big dog with his ears all up in the air and he kept falling over because he could not maneuver himself properly just yet. It reminded me of a baby who is trying to walk and keep falling over. I laughed so hard because it was so hysterical to watch. In the days we would watch television together and he would have his head on my lap. I was in love, I almost begged my brother-in-law for him.

I remember one day when he was still pretty small, I took him outside for a walk. My yard is very secure so I let him roam freely about, which he was enjoying very much, Suddenly, I was urged to look towards the sky and there was a vulture which appeared to be swooping down to pick him up. I grabbed him so fast and went inside, very shaken up. What would I have done if this vulture had taken away my ‘fur-baby’ which is really not mine. I remember some feelings of inadequacy began to creep in and I suddenly began remembering an incident that happened to me. If I am not mistaken, I must have shared it before in one of my earlier posts. I was holding someone’s baby once, and the baby’s head came down with a thud on the table I was sitting around. This baby was big for his age and so I honestly thought he had control of his limbs. I was so frightened, I felt I could cry and it did not help when someone around the table said, ‘it had to be Marie to do that.’ No one could convince me otherwise that the reason I was having problems conceiving children of my own was because I would suck at taking care of them. I would hurt them, and so here I was feeling that if this vulture had taken this pup, it would be a confirmation that I was probably not going to be a mother because I would suck at it.

From many of the Infertility blogs I have read, I see where these people have pets whom they refer to as their ‘fur-babies’ and I know these precious creatures are helping these people in their struggles a lot. After all, what like a human baby, could be so loved and loves back unconditionally , does not judge you and is always very happy to see you, than a cute cuddly pet that makes it worth it to carry on from day to day despite the challenges you face.

For those of you who are struggling with infertility and does not have a pet, I would recommend you get one. You will be surprised to see what it does for you and how much lighter your struggles appear. I only had one for a few weeks and look how it helped me, so much so, that I thought of getting a puppy for myself. I remember after telling a friend of my new found job of pup-sitting, she said, intending for it to be a joke, that I was being prepared for mine which is to come. I really believed that somehow and so I threw myself into it even more.

Thanks Diego, you were not human, but you made an impact in my life more than most human did and you made my struggles that much lighter because you came.

image by: http://images.google.tt/imgres?imgurl=http://www.geocities.com/mrsjacksonsclass/petsall.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.geocities.com/mrsjacksonsclass/pets.htm&usg=__Gv2rBEMAIGuU-SBNII1d-y7_zz8=&h=346&w=432&sz=71&hl=en&start=2&tbnid=DDWAHlLI1m4JjM:&tbnh=101&tbnw=126&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dimages%2Bof%2Bpets%26gbv%3D2%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DG

IS IT WRONG TO WANT SOMETHING SO BADLY???

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a real blessing.

Children born to a young man, are like sharp arrows in a warrior's hand.

Psalm 127 verses 3 & 4

I love children, and after marriage and the time was right, I thought it would be easy having some of my own. Unfortunatley, infertility set in and I saw my dream shattering before my very eyes. I wanted to have children so badly and as my struggles progressed, my yearning only intensified.


My yearning was so overwhelming and crippling and many times I felt guilty that I was yearning so much. I even felt I was doing something terribly wrong by yearning so much.


I remember one day, I was feeling particularly tired and beaten up by my struggles with infertility and had the chance to talk to a friend. It was the first time she was hearing of my struggles with infertility and so I was at least expecting some words of encouragement, after pouring my heart out to her, but instead she said to me, "you want to have a baby so badly, oh." I was taken aback, whatever does she mean, I thought, is it wrong to want to have a child so badly? It did not make it any easier to hear this from her for the mere fact that she herself was a mother and therefore would never know what it feels like to want to have a child and is being prevented. Her comment however still left me feeling guilty that I was yearning so much for a child and this guilt was greater than before.


There were other instances in my struggle that made me feel as if I was yearning too much for a child. I remember hearing that someone had said that I was allowing my yearning for a child to cause distress to my husband. I was saddened and angry to hear this and if I had not heard it from a third party I would have confronted the person. She too is a mother and even a grandmother. This particular incident had me feeling that persons were seeing me as this obsessed person who was consumed with my struggles to have a child so this added greatly to my guilt of yearning. It did not help either that by this time I was also consumed with the feeling that I wanted to prove to other women that I was as normal as they were, I could conceive a child just as they could, I could be a mother, have a family just as they do, after all, am I not deserving of even just that. I was however wondering if it was because my motives for wanting a child seemed a little bit selfish at times, why God was not answering my prayers.


My question therefore is, "is it wrong to want something so badly." I know it can be wrong to yearn for things that are not necessarily good for us, the job with the office with a view, the beachhouse where we can take our family for summer vacations, the bank account with the huge overdraft facility, but how can it be wrong to want a child, to want a family to whom we can give and experience unconditional love. A family that is there for us when others can't. My answer then can only be no, it is not wrong at all to yearn for these things as they are very much a natural part of our lives, a part of who we are and a part of who we will ever become.


I have been reading a lot of blogs by people experiencing infertility and with each one I read, there is one thing that stands out, there is a strong yearning for children, for a family to call their own and they are leaving no stones unturned nor sparing any costs to satisfy this yearning.


In closing I want to say to you who continue to yearn in this way, do not for one minute feel guilty for yearning so much, do not for one minute feel like you are doing anything wrong in yearning so much, yearn on, fight on, in the end it will be well worth it.



ALL THE BEST TO YOU, and until next time, keep clinging to hope.

The joys of being a mom

Before I get to the joys of being a Mom, let me just say this quickly. I do not think the New Year is too far gone to say this. I am quite aware that some of you, my readers, who are presently dealing with infertility are probably having mixed emotions right about this time of the year. I would like to tell you that for years I desperately yearned to become a mother. I remember that sometimes my most yearning desire for this was as a New Year dawned. I wanted to have hope that the New Year will be the one in which I conquered infertility. This hope however can quickly become a distress as I also started thinking that at the end of this New Year I could still be childless and still fighting infertility. The only comfort here is that you just do not know, your triumph could be just about any month as the year progresses. I encourage you therefore to focus on the positive. Like many treatment processes, overcoming infertility, I found out, is a series of small steps and possibly small gains that leads to an eventual result.
Now that I am a mother, I face each New Year much happier and more complete, ready to take on the challenges of being a mother and eager see what the year has in store for me and my family, and the changes in my son as he grows up.
Motherhood has been to me everything I had ever hoped for and more. It is a real privilege and one not at all to be taken for granted.
Every time I hold my baby in my arms or watch him sleep, something inside me just wants to hold on to that moment forever. Is it possible for me to feel more blessed?
My son is beginning to babble now and says ‘mama’ on occasions. It feels like music to my ears and I cannot wait until he begins to actually have a conversation with me.
Being a mom comes with so many privileges. You are looked on by society so differently and is treated differently as well. I feel as if I am being recognized as a woman for the sole reason of being able to share in such miracle, bringing a child into this world. We no longer have to wait in long lines, instead we are called out and given priority service. You are called to be seated first on flights whenever you travel, and you are singled out in a crowd only because someone thinks your baby is adorable.
This is such a satisfying experience and my heart goes out to women who are being robbed of this due to infertility.
After all we are made to naturally procreate, and when this is frustrated or hindered, we are left feeling empty, betrayed and less of a woman. It is important though that you do not throw in the towel. I was about to do that and turn to adoption, and just on the brink of doing so I triumphed so your triumph could be just around the corner. I know it gets frustrating at times, especially if you are undergoing treatment after treatment with no success. I found myself at that place over and over again. Oftentimes I asked myself, why I am abusing my body like this, as some treatments do in fact have terrible side effects. Now I know why, and every time that I look at my healthy baby boy I know it was all worth it. I say to you, do not give up!!!!

Welcome to - Finally a Mom

My name is Annetta Price. My husband and I suffered with infertility for over a decade. Early in our marriage, I was diagnosed with a common condition known as Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome which resulted in infertility.

My plan is to share with you my journey of struggles, anxiety, tears and disappointment and eventually, the triumphant victory of finally becoming a mother. This blog and my website, http://www.finallyamom.com/ exist to provide information, support, comfort and hope to other families who might be having similar experiences.