GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS – Feature 19 - A Life and Death Situation

Today I am grateful for the fact that I have come to accept and embrace the reality that there is life and then there is death.

I was once very terrified of death. When I heard about a death and worst if it was someone I knew, I would  go into full mode panic attack, to the point where I felt as if I was dying as well.

Recently I have been hearing a lot of news about persons who have died. For some, it is expected because these individuals are up in age and have been ailing for a while. Then there are others, young people, my age group, who have died suddenly, giving us no notice. You are then forced to wonder what is really causing people your age to be dropping like flies - just like that. Of course you are forced to think about your own mortality. What if you are not as well as you think you are, what if you should go now, what about your spouse, what about your young children, is there adequate savings and life insurance to make a difference to their lives.

Honestly, I do think about these things, but I am finding that I am not as terrified of death as before, because one thing I have come to totally accept, is the fact that there are just some things you have no control over. Life usually goes on after people die and you would be surprised to see how God causes things to fall in place and work themselves out.

I am grateful therefore that I have come to a place where death no longer scares me and as a result of this I am able to try to live each day as if it is my last, ensuring as much as possible, that I am being my best self.

LIFE HAPPENS IN THE PRESENT!!!!!

After having children, we have to change our perspective on life whether we like it or not. If not, no worries, they will change for us. Children teach us so much and one thing in particular that I want to focus on in this post is, they teach us how to stay in the moment.

Recently, one of my sisters visited from overseas and she planned for us a day with our Dad, out in the country, which she termed a ‘cookout’, even though it was more like a ‘cook in’, because we cooked inside.

After the first phase of my duties in the kitchen was over, my son, who is an energetic 5 year old, decided to indulge me in a nature walk, which he termed an adventure. We walked through almost all of my father’s property, among the lush vegetation and I was having fun with my boy. I decided to draw on my creative self and use this as a learning activity for him and so I began to identify some fruit trees and introduce him to them. He totally enjoyed that, wow am I a good mom or what, I beamed to myself. What made me uncomfortable though, was that I had to make so much effort to stay in the moment as I kept wondering if I am needed in the kitchen or if I really shouldn’t  be resting a little, as I did felt tired, until I was needed again in the kitchen to assist.

We finished our nature walk and no sooner had we finished, he was begging for another round. This time with added incentive, we now would be searching for treasure (thanks to Dora). By this time our daughter was awake from her 15 minutes nap (well, it sure felt like that because like her mommy, she is not a day sleeper) and my husband was off parenting duties because he had taken some work to finish up due to a deadline. I therefore had to make this second nature/adventure trek again, this time with added weight, as our daughter weighs over 25 pounds, well, 27 as I pen this post. This second time around was definitely no fun, and I tried very hard to show my son that I was enjoying this quality time with him. I begged him to cut this one short as I was really winded with his sister on my side. He did not give in, but somehow I succeeded in manipulating him to return to the house.

What saved me from a third nature walk was the call that dinner was ready.

When I was struggling to have children, I very often romanticized the idea of how great a mom I would be if given the chance. Reality now strikes and I am thinking, well, this one sure seem to have gotten away from me. I am only comforted by the fact that, I know I am not alone in this, because as parents we do come up short in one way or another.

The lesson here then is not just to us who are parents, but to all who have become so wound up from the spin cycle that our lives have become. We have to make special effort to remain present in life. Cease the moments when we can just kick back, relax and smell the roses.

My son taught me well, this lesson that day. After all mom, you are in the country where the vegetation is lush, no hustle, no bustle and more than all, the air is clean, why not take it all in, cease the moment.

My children continue to teach me daily, that LIFE HAPPENS IN THE PRESENT!!!!!

'GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS' - Post 5 – “What is man without friends?”

As a people, we are very ambitious and this is good, there is however a downside to this. We can lose
our selves in pursuing self-advancement; a bigger degree for that bigger salary, a bigger house, a newer car, and find ourselves wondering, why am I not happy, why does my life feel so dull. The thing is, we forget to be thankful for the little things that we already have, without which, our lives would not mean much. Our relationships, our health, our faith, our freedom, I could go on.


There are times in my life when I feel I could have achieved more in certain areas, and as a result I beat upon myself and take on a 'woe is me' attitude. Thankfully, I am soon reminded that less I be accused of being ungrateful, I do have things to be thankful for. 


In my pursuit to become a more thankful and happier person, in general then, I am urged to add a new posting feature to my blog, a segment dedicated to being thankful, which I have decided to call ‘GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS', where I will post all the things in my life that I am thankful for, regardless of how small and especially those things which I have learnt the most from.

-------------------------------------------------

I have very few friends. In fact there is a joke that my husband has on me, that he makes my friends for me and I take it, that it is because of my stutter why I have such a problem. One characteristic of a stutterer is that we do not readily open up ourselves to people, in case we be judged prematurely, because of the way we talk. As a result of this, we do not do so well socially.

Thanks to my husband then, among my few special friends are some that he indeed passed on to me. Today I want to use this space to say how grateful I am for my friends and their friendship. They lend not only their ears, when I need to talk, but their understanding that we all have and are entitled to our own unique view of things and we are also entitled to feel how we want to feel about issues in our lives and so they never judge me as a result.

It is my wish that they feel the same way about me too, if not though, I beg of them some time to become a better friend to them.

THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU MY FRIENDS.