ANGER AND INFERTILITY

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

Infertility made me angry and sometimes I just could not deal with the fact that I was so angry. I was most times angry at God, for giving me the cross of infertility to carry. I was also angry at him because he made women with nurturing qualities and then this is frustrated because that which we need to nurture is being withheld from us. Why was he taking so long to fix this, when I was so earnestly praying to him and he can fix things with just the flick of a finger.

I was angry because so many things in my daily travail of life, reminded me of what I wanted so much, a baby, a family of my own.


But, is all this anger and stress good for our trying to conceive efforts? No, they are not, they just add to the problem, because the body needs to be a healthy place to conceive and grow our precious little ones. I knew this, I knew this so much, but I just could not help how I was feeling.


I remember when I was at (what I believe was the darkest point in my struggles), a conflict arose in my family(largely due to frustration from my struggles with infertility) and I strongly believe it was this conflict that is responsible for the birth of my son. My family finally found out about the pain I was in for so long, and could not talk to them about it, and this was a great part of the stress that I was experiencing. I could not deal with the fact that I had such a loving family, so close to me, yet was struggling alone.

This took a great big load off my shoulders and I was finally able to exhale. I was finally able to release a big part of the stress I was facing, because those who I love most, could now understand and support me as I so deserved. I became pregnant very shortly, and after a miscarriage, became pregnant soon after again, and subsequently, gave birth to a healthy beautiful son.

Anger and stress, as a result of infertility is understandable, but we should remember that they can further delay the arrival of what we want so much, a child and so, (as difficult as this may be ), we should try to remember this. Take some time to exhale then, scream if you want to, cry, whatever it takes to lessen some if this anger and stress at times.


I am finding now that when I write on issues that has to do with the emotional struggles of infertility, on my blog, I still find a little bit of anger creeping in. I guess after being angry for the better part of a decade, it takes time to get over it, even though I am not sure that I will completely be rid of it, because when I think back at the pain I was in, and what I was subjected to as a result of infertility, I must admit, there is still a little anger there, but this often vanish with just one glimpse of my son.


Whenever I read some of the posts of my fellow bloggers who are currently struggling with infertility, and see the anger that is there, I understand all too well and my heart goes out to them even more.


Here is a post from a fellow blogger who speaks on this issue as well, and please find a link at the bottom of her post, which speaks about anger and infertility.


http://infertility-fertility.blogspot.com/2010/04/infertility-makes-you-angry.html

Be encouraged, therefore and until next time, keep clinging to hop

 

HOW MUCH OF A GOOD LISTENER ARE YOU???

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

One of the reasons I kept my infertility to myself through much of my struggle, was because I was terribly afraid that if I talk about it to people, they would say things that would be upsetting and insensitive and in so doing, discount the pain that I was in.

On the few occasions that I tried to talk about my struggles, or people learnt of my struggles, there were comments such as:-

• You want a baby so badly, oh.
• She is over-reacting (this came about as a result of a conflict that arose in my family, largely due to frustration from my struggles with infertility)
• You are faithless and weak, and have no use for God, this is why you are going through this.
• Search your life to see if there are any sins that would be causing you to be going through this.
• Someone even said, if they were in my position, they do not think that they would be hurting so much.

These responses came about, I believe, because these individuals did not take the time to really hear what I was saying, to get the sense of what I was feeling and as a result, I was not given the support I deserved and was subjected to some rather unfair judgement.

My devotional today, speaks about listening and it is really because most of us do not possess proper listening skills, why we are not more successful and effective in supporting each other with issues that we face daily.

My devotional reading is kind enough, to give tips for more effective listening, and these are as follows:-

• Listen without interrupting – Resist the temptation to jump in and finish the sentence, or hijack the floor. Rein yourself in – just listen.

• Listen to understand – Try to understand the point of view, feelings, thinking and needs. Good listening is actually hearing what they actually think, mean or feel, not what you imagine they do. Instead of guessing, ask, ‘Am I hearing you correctly? Do you mean……? Are you feeling…..? In other words, don’t assume – verify.
• Listen without judging. Don’t rush to conclusions. If what they say does not really add up, keep listening. ‘He who answers a matter before he hears it, it is folly and shame to him.’ (Proverbs 18:13 NKJV). When you hear more it may make sense.
• Listen without correcting, countering or devaluing. Saying, You’re just being sensitive, you are over-reacting as this puts people on guard and stops real communication.

• Validate the speaker. Accept their perceptions and feelings as valid expressions of a valued person. ‘If I understand you correctly, you’re thinking….feeling….am I right? Ask them to help get you on the same page with them. ‘Given what you’ve told me, I can see why you’d feel what you feel,’ is very validating and will increase their confidence and willingness to consider the encouragement/ solutions you may offer.

I remember talking to a friend about my struggles with my stuttering, to which she responded, ‘No, you should not feel this way. You cannot allow it to get the better of you…..etc. She made me feel so uncomfortable, and made me also feel that I was making a mountain out of a mole hill. When I told her about all the injustice I had encountered over the years as a result of my stuttering, she backed off and started saying, oh my, I did not know, you went through all of this, I am sorry. Typical point to what is said above, about listening. If she had taken the time to really listen to what I was saying, which I am sure was conveying the pain that I was in, I am pretty sure that I would not have felt so badly, neither would she, to the point where she had to apologize.

I challenge every friend, every loved one of someone who is encountering challenges in their lives, whether it be infertility or otherwise, if you find yourself being honored one day, with them wanting to talk to you about their struggles, the above tips are sure to come in handy.

Be encouraged therefore, and until then, keep clinging to hope.

Guest Post by Tania - Trying to Conceive with PCOS and Importance of Nutrition

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

 

 

 

Polycystic ovarian syndrome or PCOS is one of the most common reasons why a woman is unable to become pregnant when trying to conceive. A woman with PCOS has cysts or fluid filled sacks on the ovaries, which can prevent ovulation and hinder normal functioning of the reproductive system. Though PCOS has been a recognized disorder for more than 75 years, the causes and reasons behind it are still unknown. Some experts feel it can be related to hereditary and others believe there to be a link between PCOS and diabetes, which is also plausible.

While most women diagnosed with PCOS will have an insulin resistance problem, there are some that do not. Ovarian cysts are common with PCOS, however; there are also cases of women being diagnosed with no cysts at all. Trying to conceive with PCOS can be very difficult, but not impossible, especially when a woman is proactive about her health and employs a battery of different things to address the symptoms of the disease.

A woman with PCOS and insulin resistance will have higher than normal levels of insulin and the body does not use the hormone effectively. Insulin resistance is normally handled through the use of certain medications and for some women; a special diet can also help alleviate some of the side effects. By working to stabilize insulin levels it can help with PCOS-related obesity and can promote fertility, making it much easier to become pregnant when trying to conceive.

With insulin resistance, some women with PCOS can find weight gain and obesity a very disturbing, but genuine problem. One research study showed that women consuming certain diets and having PCOS put themselves at a higher risk of gaining weight. A low fat diet plan may not be ideal for a woman with PCOS, a standard low fat-high carbohydrate diet may not be the best approach either because of the way the body converts these foods into fats. When fats and carbohydrates are converted to sugars, it can result in a fluctuation of insulin levels which can lead to a crash in blood sugar and overeating.

There are certain dietary recommendations which a woman can use when dealing with insulin resistance due to PCOS. It is recommended not to consume carbohydrates alone, but to combine with protein and fat in order to balance out the meal. Choosing foods low on the glycemic index will cause a slower rise in blood sugar, having more fiber content also means it takes longer to digest, which means insulin levels are more likely to remain stable. Do not limit carbohydrates so much that ketosis (incomplete metabolism of fatty acids) occurs; eating less than 40 grams of carbs per day is not recommended.

Other dietary recommendations for a woman with PCOS include spacing out carbs through the day and avoiding carbs which can trigger hunger or cravings. It is also recommended a woman takes a vitamin/mineral supplement to help fill in any dietary gaps and ensure optimal health. With certain dietary and lifestyle accommodations made, a woman can live with and manage the symptoms of PCOS in the healthiest way possible.

Trying to conceive with PCOS is something that can present a challenge for many women. When considering all the ways there are in which to treat and manage the disease, it pays for a woman to check into all the various possibilities. PCOS does not have to result in infertility for a woman and once brought under control through medical care and lifestyle and dietary changes, the chances of pregnancy improve as does the woman’s health.

THIS STORY MAKES ME SAD………

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

There are so many sad stories in the news today, and I am sure we all know by now, that if we need a lift in our spirits, on any given day, we just cannot watch the news, we just have to cuddle up with a good book, or watch a light comedy.

The story is told about this woman in Myrtle Beach, S.C., who after having triplets, became disabled due to a brain hemorrhage she suffered after giving birth.

She is now locked in a legal battle with the children's father, who is not allowing them to see their mother as he thinks, it might not be good for them, as they might develop guilty feelings, knowing that their birth was the cause of their mother’s tragedy. Ok, so he is thinking about the children's well being, great, but what about the mother's feelings, don't they count too, and should'nt they count even more, given her situation? I totally think her feelings should matter too. The story goes on to say that the woman, even though helpless, looks at pictures of her children with expressions that indicates that she really wants to see them.

I don’t know about anyone else, but this story has left me feeling very sad and totally upset at this man. This mother deserves to see her children, as she is their only mother. These kids might be young now (4 years old), but eventually they will start asking questions about their mother, so why not just start the whole process now (there is a saying that goes ‘the sooner the better’) and I believe the sooner you have these children deal with this situation, the better it will be for everyone involved.

“This woman’s story began happily in 2002. After graduating from college in Ohio and becoming a chiropractor in Atlanta, Dorn married Dan Dorn, a devoutly religious man who shared her orthodox Jewish beliefs.


They settled in Los Angeles near his family and began planning a family of their own. But they struggled to conceive. After turning to fertility treatments, the couple finally received word in the fall of 2005 that they were expecting triplets.


"She was so excited to be pregnant -- she was beginning to say 'I don't know if I'll ever get to be a mother,'" Dorn's mother, Susan Cohen, said.


But happiness turned into heartbreak after Dorn delivered the three children. What happened in the hospital in the hours after the triplets were born is unclear. And the case was eventually settled out of court for more than $7 million. What the family does know is that Dorn began bleeding internally. Her injury was not caught soon enough, and after a series of missteps, Dorn's brain was deprived of oxygen, leaving her severely disabled.


Since the day her three children were born, Dorn has required around the clock care. She is unable to speak or move on her own and remains in bed unless one of her caretakers moves her to a chair.”

This story touches me even deeper, because this woman had infertility issues and had to turn to alternative methods to conceive, and I cannot help but put myself and countless other women, who have struggled with infertility and who are currently struggling with infertility, in this position. Can you imagine not being allowed to see your children after let’s say, in my case, a decade long of infertility struggles. It just boggles my mind.

Let me know what your thoughts are on this story, Do you feel the same way I feel? Your comments will be greatly appreciated.

Catch you for my next post, and until then keep clinging to hope.

ARE YOU AN EMPOWERED PATIENT???

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

The empowered patient, in my opinion, is one who does not depend on their doctor alone to make the decisions and give all the information regarding their treatment. They do their own research (even though many doctors do not like this) and they take part as much as possible in the direction that they want their treatment to go.

I have been meeting a lot of empowered patients online, since I have been blogging. On the subject matter that I blog about (infertility), there are a lot of people sharing information about their infertility challenge and I find that this helps many who are dealing with the same condition, as it broadens the light that they currently view their condition in, and allows them to make more informed and practical decisions, as it relates to their treatment. This does not only help others medically, but it offers a bond, because, even though people may be complete strangers, there is some amount of familarity, as people know right away that they are not alone in their struggles.

I was not an empowered patient when I was struggling with infertility, or it would not have taken me over a decade, to triumph over this condition. This I believe is largely due to the fact that I was not internet savvy at the time and did not know that a whole new world of information and support was waiting for me, by way of the internet. I was just content with following my doctors lead and relied only on information he gave me. Later in my struggles, however, when I saw that my age was also becoming an infertility factor, I made some adjustments to how I was dealing with my treatment process, and that was when everything changed for me, as I then was forced to take on the role of the empowered patient.

Please find below a link for a presentation from a survey done by Chris Schroeder, CEO Health Central and James Burroughs, Associate Professor of Commerce, University of Virginia, April 8, 2010, DTC Conference, Washington D.C., on their findings about the empowered patient.

This presentation is geared at persons dealing chronic conditions like diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis, but I do believe, by extension, it can be applied to every patient dealing with a condition over a prolonged period of time.

http://www.healthcentral.com/about/the-empowered-patient/

From the presentation:-

“Making treatment choices and selecting health care providers are high stakes decisions for people living with chronic conditions such as diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis. Finding the right doctor who can in turn find the right therapeutic regimen often makes the difference between a high quality of life and a low one for these patients.


Some of these people who are faced with ongoing treatment decisions take a more active role in their health care plan, while others are more comfortable following a doctor’s lead.”

Here’s to you, the empowered patient.

DEALING WITH UNEXPLAINED INFERTILITY

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

 

 

It is estimated that about 15 to 25% of persons struggling with infertility, will be told that their diagnosis is unexplained infertility and this is when all initial tests done, comes up with no reason for not being able to conceive.

This I believe, is the most difficult infertility diagnosis to receive, because you won’t know what kind of treatment to undertake for your condition, as you really don’t know what to treat, and this can prove to be very frustrating.

Here are some sites that talk about unexplained infertility and which tell you also, how to deal with this, if you have been so diagnosed.

http://pregnancy.families.com/blog/dealing-with-unexplained-infertility

http://www.conceive.com/unexplained-infertility-tests.php

From the site:

“It can be hard to deal with the fact that you are infertile but some couples have experienced what is known as unexplained infertility. It can be heartbreaking to want to get pregnant, and not know what is wrong with you. Usually women who have gone through intrauterine insemination and in vitro fertilization unsuccessfully are given an unexplained infertility diagnosis.”

The book, If at First You Don't Conceive: A Complete Guide to Infertility from One of the Nation's Leading Clinics by Dr. William Schoolcraft, MD HCLD, has very helpful information on this subject as well. Get your copy today.

Be encouraged, and until next time, keep clinging to hope.

ADOPTION GONE AWRY?????

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: verses 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

Towards the latter part of our struggles with infertility, we began thinking about the option of adopting and after I lost our daughter in 2006, We visited our local adoption bureau, for an information package.

Throughout this time, all I could think of was, what kind of personality and character would the child we adopt have, and because these thoughts were so foremost in my mind, my husband and I decided that we would adopt a very young child, age up to three months old. Sometimes I think that because we would love that child so much, this would not be an issue, but it still haunts me. We made the decision to adopt a very young child because we think this would give us a chance to mold this child into what we want him/her to be even though we know that children are born with their personality and character traits, but we would try nevertheless.

I remember when one of my brothers found out that we were thinking of adopting, he said to me, make sure you check all the medical records of this child, to ensure that you get a healthy one. I think this is important too, but I just cannot get past the personality and character issue, and then I realize that I am really very scared.

There was a story recently in the news, about this seven year old child, Justin, who was adopted six months ago. His adopted mother sent him back to Russia alone, because she did not want him anymore. She says he has violent and psychological problems and had plans to burn their house down and even had a hit list of persons he was going to kill, including his adopted mother. There is currently an outrage, as people are upset with this woman, because she sent the child back to Russia alone. It is said that she had someone from the Orphanage in Russia, where the boy is originally from, meet him at the airport. Russia is very upset with America because of this and is considering suspending all future adoptions from that country.

When I heard this story, my mind went back to my thoughts about adoption, and our decision to adopt a very young child, is even more cemented, if and when we should revisit this. Barbara Walters, on her show, The View, said, ‘if you want a perfect child do not adopt, and was even relating some problems she had with her adopted daughter. I know the chances are high that I might not get a perfect child, whether I adopt them from infant stage or not. I also know that all kids up for adoption need a chance at a loving family and home, but stories like this, does make it harder for kids like Justin.

If you were this adopted mother, how would you have dealt with this situation? This is a legetimate reason I beleive, to want to return an adopted child, because you have to think about your safety, the child's safety and the safety of your family as well. With this said, I would have contacted the proper authorities in Russia to let them know of the problems I was having with the child and also the authorities in my country, to get their advice on how to proceed, and then if returning him, becomes the option, I would accompany this little boy back to Russia, because I believe at least, I owe him this, if I want to be looked on as a capable parent. He is also a minor and this makes it even more necessary for him to have an adult accompany him.

"THIS TOO SHALL PASS......."

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

Are you dealing with grief of any kind at the moment, the loss of your fertility, the loss of a pregnancy that you have been praying for, for so long, the loss of a loved one, it could even be the loss of financial freedom, yes ,you could be grieving for so many things.

Grief is a process, and it starts first with shock and denial, I cannot believe this is happening to me, no, it just couldn’t. As the shock wears off, it is replaced with pain and guilt, this is a step you must allow yourself to experience, as hard as it may be, as it is very important or you will find that the process not only takes longer, but is also harder. (Have you ever met anyone who cannot seem to get pass their grief, be it many years since? Well, it could be that they have escaped dealing with the pain and guilt associated with their loss). Then comes anger, you are angry, sometimes it is with God, how could he allow this to happen to me? Then you move into depression and loneliness as you try to deal with the emptiness you are feeling as a result of your loss. (I remember when I was grieving the loss of my daughter, this was the hardest stage for me. This emptiness is really hard to put into words). Then comes the upward turn, you begin to adjust to life without that which you have lost and start making plans to move on. Then finally, there is acceptance, you suddenly realize that you are not the only one dealing with things of this nature, and have also come to terms with that fact that life is all about uncertainty and change.You realize too, that you are not grieving as much anymore, you are not all together happy, but life seem worth living again. It is often time, a long road to this point though, but what is important is that this process is taking place as you grieve, and no matter how long and hard, we all usually get to a place of acceptance and gradually peace.

Just allow me to join with the very decorated gospel singer, Yolanda Adams, to remind you, that this too shall pass. Even though it might seem now that you are trapped in this dark cave of grief, take heart, you will one day wake up and suddenly realize that you are seeing the light of day again.

This post is dedicated to a fellow blogger, who lost her long awaited pregnancy this week, at 8 weeks gestational age. I know only too well, the pain you and yours is in girl, but just so you know, you are in my prayers and God will see you through.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR ANGEL IN HEAVEN – Our First Miracle

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

Today we pause to say a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY, to our first little miracle, Sara-Marie Abigail Price, who was born sleeping on April 2, 2006, (four years ago).

For all those who do not know the story of our first little miracle, I crave your indulgence.

After more than a decade long of struggling with infertility, we learned that we were expecting in September, 2005. We were so ecstatic, my husband and I hugged each other and dance around the room.

As the pregnancy progressed, I found that I just could not embrace and enjoy it, as I had dreamt of doing for so long. Each month we visited our doctor, despite the very good reports, I just could not shake the feeling that something would go wrong. I sometimes dismissed this feeling though, thinking it was only jitters from having waited so long and as a result of previous miscarriages, only to have it return shortly afterwards

In the seventh month of our pregnancy, the day after a lovely baby shower was thrown for me, we visited our doctor, for what we believed would be another routine visit with a good report. My doctor, who is very jovial and funny, began the examination, making us laugh as usual. Before long into the examination, we realized that he got very quiet and was looking at the screen of his examination machine, quite intently. He even took a seat on the examination table beside me – something he never did in any of our previous visits. This was when I knew that the feelings of uneasiness I had since the pregnancy was about to confirm that something was indeed wrong I remember my husband asking him if there was a problem and he said, yes. The room suddenly went black, I blacked out, even though I was lying down (I have never heard of this).

I came around shortly after and he asked us to join him at his desk, where he proceeded to write us a referral to a fetal specialist, to see exactly what was happening with our baby. I remember glancing on the referral and saw the term hydrops fetalis, in the space for diagnosis and he then proceeded to explain to us what this was. I really was not listening as I was still trying to come to terms with all that was taking place.

We went to see the fetal specialist and when he began the examination, I saw him turned the screen away from me and said, he did not want me to see the images. By this time though, I was ready to accept my fate, so it probably would not have made any difference if I had seen the images.

We collected the results a few days afterwards and it was confirmed that our baby had been diagnosed with hydrops fetalis, ( a severe, life-threatening problem of severe edema (swelling) in the fetus and newborn and occurs when too much fluid leaves the bloodstream and goes into the tissues). Babies diagnosed with this condition, usually have a low chance of survival.

Our doctor tried to give us hope by assuring us that he was focused on the 30% chance of survival and he challenged us to do the same too.

We waited almost a month for further testing to be done, to see if they could find the exact cause of this condition and all this time, I prayed to God earnestly and others prayed as well and I believed deeply, that things would somehow turn around for us. It was with that faith that I got up out of bed one day, and started preparing the nursery. I felt I had to do this because, if things turned around, I wanted to be ready. This was undoubtedly one of the longest, hardest month ever. The tests all came back negative and I was feeling even more optimistic.

Our doctor referred us to our University Hospital for management from then on of our pregnancy, in hopes of getting treatment for our baby intrauterine.

Sadly, while a doctor was doing my examination, he realized that there was no heartbeat. Our baby had left us without us knowing.

I was admitted the next day (being Saturday), to give birth, and in the wee hours of Sunday morning, April 2, 2006, our little miracle was born sleeping, weighing just over 2 pounds. She fought a good fight, but the battle was not hers to win. I remember I had decided that I would not look at her after she was born, because I did not want to have that image embedded in my mind, as I believed it would have made it harder for me. I however found myself actually trying to look at her, but my husband objected, I guess because he too thought it would have been too painful for me. He saw her though and it was indeed very difficult for him.

The days following this, were some of the darkest days of my life. I never cried so much in my life, and it all began the day after I gave birth and continued right through that night and into the days ahead. I was so angry with God that I refused to even talk to him, I wanted to ask him why, but I just could not. I could not even pray.

I remember being on my way home from the hospital, and found myself scanning my medicine cabinet at home, to have a mental picture of all the pills I had in there that I could take, to put a quick end to this overwhelming grief that I was in, because it was just too much for me. God stepped in though and had me tell my husband that I did not want to be alone at home in the days ahead. I told him this, after feeling very afraid that I was actually thinking suicide, and so the next day and for the rest of that week, I went to my sister’s to stay with her housekeeper, who herself, had had experience with grief, having lost her husband, and my sister thought she could help me through my grief as well.

I made it through those difficult days, largely due to the kind support of my family, especially my eldest sister and my Church family and friends. A very good friend lent me the book, When God Doesn't Make Sense By. Dr. James Dobson, and this really helped me put things into perspective. In essence, what this book is saying is that - life is about change and we are never targeted for bad things to happen to us, this is just all a part of life, and the sooner we understand this, the sooner we are able to accept what comes our way, and  trust God to help us heal from our wounds. I strongly recommend this book for anyone dealing with grief.

My Mom says, our daughter was just too beautiful, so God decided to keep her for himself and I truly believe that. My mother-in-law says that our daughter, gave herself as a sacrifice to make way for our second miracle, because my body needed cleansing from all the anxiety, depression and treatment that I had undergone as a result of my struggle with infertility. I strongly believe that too and this makes our little angel all the more special to us.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY GIRL, Your dad, your brother and I can’t wait to meet you in the sweet by and by. Continue resting in the arms of Jesus, where you belong, because you must be tired from the fight you fought to stay with us.

WE WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU.

SUBJECT: A HAPPY AND HOLY EASTER TO YOU

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

It is that time of year again when we celebrate this holy season of Easter.

Every day there is more and more evidence of an overwhelming sense of hopelessness, sadness, anger and just very challenging times all around. Is this because we are putting our trust and faith in man, in our systems, in ourselves? Well this could be why we are experiencing this much misery at this time.

1 Corinthians 15 verse 19 (KJV), says, “If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are all men most miserable.” In essence this verse is saying that we are not to look too much for hope here on earth, or we will be like men most miserable and look, this is really what is happening. Let me remind us, that we need to put or hope and trust in God and then the “things of this earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of his glory and grace.”

Psalms 43 verse 5 (KJV), also says, “Why art thou cast down, O my soul? And why art thou disquieted within me? Hope in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.

This is the reason that Christ sent his only son to give us this hope, so that we do not go around looking all tired and bent over from the cares of this life, but instead go around with healthy looking countenances, because we do know this hope. We are indeed product of this hope.

Every time I think of this great sacrifice that God made, in sending his only son to die for us, I know I could not do it with my one and only son, who took over a decade to show up. This is why it’s just God and God alone who is capable of such things.

Let us truly reflect on the reason God did this unselfish act for us, and let us not mind too much or wonder why all that is happening around us, is really happening, as these things are just signs of the times. All we as children of God need to do, is to put our hope in Him even more, as he so wants us to do.

Let us therefore use this time as one for, Reflection, Recommitment and Renewal.