MONDAY RAMBLINGS - When the shoe is on the other foot.......

When my husband and I began trying to start our family, I had no problem when people asked us if we had plans to have children. Some even wanted to know what we were waiting for.

As soon as I became aware that I had infertility issues and my struggles intensified, I felt differently about those questions, to the point where when persons asked the question and then add, 'you guys are not ready yet? I quickly responded 'no, we are not ready' just so I was not tempted to give additional information.  This worked for a while and then I started feeling like a fraud. Why was I misleading people, I asked myself, when I would have moved heaven and earth just to become pregnant. Why was I so cruel to myself.

The questions did not stop, they became more frequent even, but this time my answers changed. I started responding with, 'its in God's hands,' hoping that persons would read between the lines and get the message that something was preventing us from realizing this dream.

Well, there are persons that I do know of now, who have been married for just about the time when you would expect them to start their family and dare I ask. I am tempted though, but when the shoe is on the other foot, it is an entirely different story. Knowing the difficulty I had with these questions, I do not wish for anyone else to experience this on my account, and so I am happy to join the wait to see what unfolds.

In the same way, there are persons I know who are struggling with infertility and I am so careful what I say around them and stands eager to offer any assistance, as a result of my journey.

All around us, there are persons struggling with one thing or another and so for the few who are so blessed to not have any struggles, it should not be too hard to understand that pain is pain  I want to encourage us all then to try and put on someone else's shoe, (the saying goes - 'never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes), you will be amazed to see how much more there is to understand about life's struggles and pain, and as a result be there for each other and empathize more.

I hope this Monday Ramblings feature makes sense, if not, then I guess it would have lived up to the segment name.

HAVE A BLESSED MONDAY






post image by: http://mychinaconnection.com/english-proverb/the-shoe-is-on-the-other-foot-or-walking-in-someone-elses-shoes/

INFERTILITY FACTS NEWS AND VIEWS - “Meal Timing Can Significantly Improve Fertility in Women with Polycystic Ovaries

Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) was the cause of my infertility and so I am happy to post any information which could help others who are also suffering from this condition.

Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), a common disorder that affects fertility by interfering with menstruation, ovulation, hormones, and more, is closely related to insulin levels. Women with this condition are typically "insulin resistant" -- their bodies produce an excess amount of insulin used in the delivery of glucose from the blood into the muscles. This excess makes its way to the ovaries, where it results in the production of testosterone, which impairs fertility.

According to a recent research, there has been found a way that women of normal size, (many women who suffer from PCOS are obese with a small percentage who is of normal size - I am one such) can manage their glucose and insulin levels and this is all in the timing of their meals. Women with PCOS, who have high calorie breakfasts, (which includes high protein and carbohydrate), and lower their calorie intake for subsequent meals throughout the day, saw a reduction in their insulin levels, leading to lower levels of testosterone and increased ovulation frequency, thus greatly enhancing their chance of conceiving.

Follow the link below for more information:-

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/08/130813121626.htm

Post image by : http://www.fertilitynation.com/5-pcos-diet-plan-tips-to-boost-your-fertility-and-help-you-get-pregnant/

MONDAY RAMBLINGS – We are all in this thing together…….

Before I had children, I was horrified when I had to attend the birthday parties of my niece and nephews and my friends’ children. Why do you suppose? I could not escape it, there were cute children everywhere and parents sitting around with watchful eyes, engaged in conversations about what else? their children, and where does that leave me, feeling extremely left out.

As you can well imagine, things changed when I had children, I was no longer horrified, instead I accepted each invitation feeling as excited as my child, because I know, this time, I would definitely fit in.

Yesterday I attended a birthday party, it was a pool party and after I got the children prepared for the pool and sent them off with their dad, I began talking with a lady who I know very well and who I know have had a couple of miscarriages. The conversation began with both of us agreeing how dangerous water is, and we each gave a tragic story involving the drowning death of a child.  We both agreed how nervous we get when our children are around water. To further add to the conversation, I said to her that it would be very tragic if after struggling so long to have children, we  lose them in such awful way (not a wise conversation to have in a setting like that I might add). The conversation then head straight into us talking about miscarriages. She told me a little bit about her miscarriages and I began telling her about the miscarriage of my first daughter. What I find is that when I am engaged in conversation with a woman about infertility challenges or miscarriages, one of the first things they say to me, is that people do not understand. This time even as I agreed, I was quickly able to be practical and say to her that people won’t understand if they have not had the experience, she agreed, chimed in and helped me finished this thought.  I know that we were able to agree and say this with such grace and understanding because of how much we have grown since our triumph over infertility and miscarriages.

Throughout the evening, as I found myself in little pockets of conversation, the subject was the same, conversations about our children and I felt like I belonged, It was indeed liberating.

As the children enjoyed themselves in the pool, you could see the parents intently watching, ensuring that they are safe. One parent even confessed to me that whenever she goes to these parties, she comes prepared, should the event arise where she has to jump into the pool to save her children. She did live up to her words that evening as she quickly sprang into action when a child was caught in a difficult situation. I know with the rest of us parents, even if we did not come prepared, we would have jumped into the water in a heartbeat to save ours or any other child, because of how precious these little ones are to us.

 I know if I should have spoken to some other parents at that party, I would have heard more stories of miscarriages and struggles to have children, because many women experience these struggles, its just that some do not talk about it and so  I do believe that for every couple of women we come across, there is a story of infertility and miscarriage. I want to take comfort in the fact then, that as women, we are certainly in this thing together.

Thanks for once again indulging in my Monday ramblings.

Post image by:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/barkaway/364787802/

INFERTILITY FACTS, NEWS AND VIEWS -"Freezing Sperm taken directly from testicles is effective for Infertile Couples"

It is now common knowledge that a woman’s egg can be frozen to be later used for conception via Invitro-Fertilization. In the same way, according to a recent study, sperm taken by way of a biopsy, directly from a man’s testicles, can be frozen to be later used for conception for infertile couples.

This procedure known as intracytoplasmic sperm injection (ICSI) may be beneficial to men who have little or no sperm in their semen as a result of genetics, cancer or testicular failure.

These men would not be able to achieve pregnancy because there is not enough sperm in their semen and so a biopsy of the testicles would be the best option for them.

Read more by following the link below

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/08/130806165928.htm

GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS – Better now than later…..

Last week my son went off to camp, it was such a difficult week for me as I was missing him terribly, so much so, that by the time he was half way through camp, I remember thinking to myself, “who am I kidding, I cannot do this.”

By this time, his father got a chance to speak to him, thanks to the camp nurse. Of course I was very happy for that, but when my husband told me that he began crying that he wanted to come home, I felt so guilty that we had made him do something he was not ready for. I soldiered on, however, thinking that at least he is halfway through camp so he should be home before we knew it.

I remember telling someone on Sunday last, that I was missing my son terribly. She said to me in a matter of fact kind of way  “this is good for you and your son, you had better do this now than later when he is getting married and moving out, because then it will be more difficult.” She did speak to my core and I was very grateful and indeed comforted.

In our son’s own words, when asked if he enjoyed camp, “I did enjoy camp, like the first day, but after that my friend (His buddy that went only because he was going) and I were missing home. I told him we are sorry he had to go though that but it is normal and all a part of life. We did get a call from someone we knew well, who was part of the camp’s administration, who confirmed that there were times when she saw him looking sad and so she made it her duty to hug him and comfort him those times, we are so appreciative of this.

As it relates to bathing, he said an adult soap his rag for him and he bathed himself. We asked him about brushing his teeth, he said, “well, I could not find my toothbrush.” I was horrified, what do you mean, I packed it with the toothpaste, soap etc., you mean for the whole week, you did not brush your teeth? He said, well, I used my finger. Kudos to him for thinking to do this, and I immediately turned to my husband and said, well, he will have to get a thorough bath and his mouth a thorough brushing, before anything else.

He came back looking a bit like he had lost some weight, I almost cried. “What have they done to my boy?” I screamed inside. He told us how hungry he was and asked for mash potatoes and a grilled cheese sandwich. He had it all and asked again for a snack.

He did not come back empty handed though, he won a Bible competition and won some races on sports day. That’s our son, the achiever, we are so proud of him and we are very happy and indeed grateful that we were able to give him the chance, as hard as it was, to have this experience.

INFERTILITY FACTS, NEWS AND VIEWS - Unexplained Infertility, could exposure to BPA be the reason?

About 20% of couples experience what is known as unexplained infertility. This occurs when  there is difficulty conceiving, but it is not clear why.

According to a recent study, exposure to BPA (the material used in water bottles, some plastic containers, baby bottles etc.) could be contributing to this, as this could result in the disruption of the maturation of eggs.

Read more, by following the link below:-

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/07/130731093718.htm

post image by:

http://topnews.ae/content/217257-bpa-plastic-harmful-couples