IS THE DECISION UP TO US, REALLY?

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

“HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE”

I always knew I wanted more than just one child, but my struggles with infertility, saw me bargaining with God, telling him that if he just give me one, I would be pretty fine with that and would adopt another, as a thank you to him, for answering my prayers.


After I had my son, I was convinced that I was quite fine with just him, and more so, given the fact that I was so nervous and anxious with this pregnancy, I really did not want to have to experience this amount of anxiety and nervousness again, because it truly wore me out. We were then totally convinced that we would do adoption, to give him company.

Then I became pregnant unexpectedly last January, but found I had experienced a missed abortion early in the pregnancy. I was sure now, that I did not want to go down this road again, the miscarriages, the anxieties, the unknown and so my husband and I decided that this would be it and we started thinking of beginning adoption proceedings. Soon I began wondering, we have banked on this adoption thing, but what if it is not as easy as the brochure makes it out to be? Thankfully, not long afterwards, we began hearing stories of persons who had difficulties adopting and these are persons who we believe would be easy to be approved to adopt a child, given their status, and realized that we, without a doubt would be sure to experience even more difficulties in this regard.

Before long I realized that I was grieving for the pregnancy I had just lost, and wishing I had carried it, if for the only reason that my son would be sure of a sibling to grow up with, as I am one who does not believe that a child should grow up alone, if it can be prevented, and having seen how difficult it is for only children, not to mention the questions and conversations that the parents have to deal with, it began haunting me that my family might be subjected to this as well, given our plans. We immediately began rethinking our decision.

Then came the feeling of guilt, how could we have banked on adoption and made the decision not to have any more children, without thinking about the pros and cons and not thinking enough, about the needs of our son, How would we handle the questions when he starts asking them, ‘how comes I do not have a brother or a sister?’ Further, how would we feel when he draws his first picture of his family in kindergarten and realized that his picture has only three persons and those of his classmates have more and he is demanding answers from us. I personally would feel very guilty and feel that we have betrayed him, because life is just too difficult as it is, for a child not to have a sibling to grow up with, someone to lean on as they chart their course through life, someone to be themselves with, someone to share little secrets with, someone who they can count on to be there for them.

It is with this in mind that we are working closely with our doctor to give our son the company he deserves, because is it up to us, really, to make the decision, not have any more children after having just one? This decision, I believe, would be up to us to make, if we were told that having another pregnancy would be detrimental to my health, or if financially we could not afford any more, even though, who is ever totally convinced up front, that they can afford a child, when they begin thinking of having them. My Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and age is a factor for anxiety yes, but we live in an age where women with fertility issues are still getting pregnant and women who are forty and over are also becoming pregnant and having healthy babies, so why can’t I do it too.

If our efforts does not bring about the result we desire, then we would be satisfied that we did our part and it sure would be easier to explain to our son, when he starts asking questions. I have already come up with a response if that time should come, and it goes, well son, we tried to give you company, but you are so special that God wants us to have just you.

We are forever grateful to God for our son, but we really believe he needs a sibling and we are still thinking of adopting, but much later down the road.

If there are anyone currently caught in this situation, I hope this post will be encouraging to you.

Be blessed, and until next time, keep clinging to hope.

”NATURAL REMEDIES FOR INFERTILITY”

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

“HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE”

Some of us would be surprised to know that our infertility issues, lies entirely with us and therefore need no visit to any expensive specialist, who will further drain our pockets by putting us on expensive treatments.


Are we indulging in too much caffeine and alcohol, that could defeat our chances of becoming pregnant. Are we timing intercourse. Timing is everything, as we are only fertile a few days out of our cycle.

See what else Tania of Trying to Conceive  has to say about Natural Remedies for infertility

The more we know, the quicker we are able to realize our dreams of conceiving.

ALL THE BEST

PROMISING OVARIAN CANCER SCREENING

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 & 4

“HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE”

 

Healthy women might soon be able to have screening done for the early detection of Ovarian Cancer. This is surely good news for all women and especially for those who are at increased risk.


As someone who has been diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), and was told by my doctor that this can lead to cancer, I immediately thought that he was referring to ovarian cancer, since it is the ovaries that is affected in the case of PCOS. Upon research, I found out that women with PCOS are not at risk for ovarian cancer, instead we are at increased risk for Endometrial Cancer.

Women are at increased risk for ovarian cancer, as it relates to the following:-

• Age. Ovarian cancer usually develops after menopause. Women over age 60 have the highest risk. However, it is not confined to older women; one quarter of ovarian cancer deaths occur in women 35 - 54 years of age.
• Family history. If a close blood relative of yours (mother, sister, daughter) has had ovarian cancer, your risk is higher.
• Infertility & childbearing status. Women are at increased risk if they’ve had difficulty conceiving, had children late in life, have never been pregnant, or have never used birth control pills.
• Fertility drugs. In some studies, researchers have found that prolonged use of the fertility drug clomiphene citrate, especially without achieving pregnancy, may increase the risk for developing ovarian tumors. If you are taking this drug, you should discuss its potential risks with your doctor. However, infertility also increases the risk of ovarian cancer, even without use of fertility drugs.

The more we know, the more we can preserve lives.

Be encouraged therefore.