MONDAY RAMBLINGS – ‘A camping he has gone……’

My son went off a few hours ago to his first camp, which is an annual event put on by our Church and last for a week. This happens to also be the first time he will be away from home for an extended period of time and so I have been taking comfort in the fact that I have due reason to be feeling such anxiety. I am comforted in the fact though, that a couple other children from Church, one of which is his cousin and another, his best buddy, (who his parents sent only because our son was going), is there.

I have been missing my boy a lot and so I have resorted to using this as my post today, just to see if I will feel better.

This past week, as camp drew near, I realized that I was feeling a lot of anxiety. First of all, he will be about 4 hours away, on the other side of the country and it just freaks me out to imagine these little ones sitting in a bus for all this time. The other thing is, how competent is the driver? I remember saying to my husband a couple times this past week, that I hope whoever the driver is, knows that he is carrying precious cargo and many of these kids are only children, so this makes them all the more special. I know they will have a safe journey though, because prayer was said over them and I know God is control. 

There goes my anxiety over just the journey, As you can well imagine, I do have others, like how well will he be taken care of, as he has not yet mastered taking a bath, brushing his teeth and cleaning himself after using the toilet. He is afraid of being alone and he is terrified of the dark. At nights, he asks that his father tuck him into bed and will not settle down for sleep unless his father is snuggled up in bed with him. We tried to prepare him, by telling him that his daddy won’t be around to tuck him into bed and asked if he wanted to take his pillow pet, which would serve the purpose of pillow and something to cuddle and go to sleep. He responded like a big boy would, I want to take my regular pillow and so we take it that he will sort himself out at bed time. I know there will be adults there to help them, but as any parent can attest to, no one takes care of your child as good as you.

On a much lighter note, the setting for our Church camp is usually a school out in the countryside and so the classrooms become dormitories. My son seems to think that he will be camping in a tent outdoors (thanks to television) and even though we tried to explain to him, he does not seem to get it. Last night before he went to bed, he was building a forte and saying that he was practicing for camp. I decided to let him be and even helped him out a bit.  I guess when he arrives at camp and see that the setting is totally different from what his little mind has conjured up, he will be disappointed.

They should be getting there soon and the organizers told us that they will call when they have arrived and so my husband and I are anxiously waiting for this call, as we contemplate how we will spend this time without him and wait with open arms to greet him and hear all about his adventure, when he returns.

image by:
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GRATEFUL WEDNESDAYS – Feature 31 – It’s a matter of perspective

In these turbulent financial times, We are one of the few families who can have a parent staying home with the children, until they are ready for school. 

We did not start out with this being the plan, because when our son was 8 months old, I went out to work, only to have him get sick at the nursery a couple days after and because I had to take time off to tend to him, I lost the job. This made us decide that I would stay home with him until he was school age. Our daughter came and because of this past experience, we chose to make the same decision.

So how can you afford to do this, when times are so hard? you may be eager to ask. That is a fair question I might add, so here is the answer -We are able to do this, not because my husband makes a lot of money, but because with a lot of practice we have now grasped very well, how to live on a budget and further, we owe a lot of gratitude to my in-laws as they unselfishly decided to give of themselves, to have us stay with them since our return back home, until we decide on our next move, which should be soon. I must add that this has its challenges too, because we all love our own space to be ourselves, instead of always wondering if the people you are with are tired of you yet. Thank goodness, if our in-laws even feel this way, they have never made us aware, and the trade off for them is that they have their grandchildren around them at all times. I know saying goodbye when the time comes will be very hard.

Another psychological issue associated with the decision to be a stay at home parent, is guilt. I do suffer much guilt at times, especially when the finances decide that they will not be subjected to severe stretching and bending to be adequate. Thank goodness I have found a very effective way of dealing with this - I put things into perspective – as a result of my staying home with the children, I am able to save my family nursery fee for the baby, after school care fees for our son, doctor fees, because babies do get sick a lot when they are in nurseries and not to mention the cost associated with me going out to work – clothes, lunch etc. When I do the math, this is greater than or equal to a salary that I would take home. I must admit that I do get very tired at times and wish I was out working, just to get a break, but I am soon thrust back into the reality of this perspective.

I therefore no longer suffer any guilt from being a stay at home parent, instead I am grateful everyday that I have the opportunity of spending such quality time with my children, something a lot of parents with young children wished they could do and now look forward with great anticipation to what I will do, when our daughter goes off to school next year.