“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand.”
Psalm 127: 3 & 4
I know I might get in some hot water for this post but I am fine with that, it will only be giving me the total blogging experience because I am told that comments can be brutal and I am yet to see any such.
Seriously though, are our doctors selling us short? When a couple battling infertility ends up in a doctor’s office for help, they go there with all intentions that they will get the help they need to make their dreams of having a family a reality. Why then are some couples having such a difficult time. Shouldn’t their doctors do a thorough diagnosis as is possible, instead of giving them a diagnosis of only some of the issues they face, while seemingly ignoring the other possible ones. The reality is when these issues are deemed fixed and the couple still fail to become pregnant, they can become so disillusioned and discouraged because I am sure they are thinking that their troubles are over when in fact, they have only just begun. I know I have been there, because after my surgery for my PCOS and my six months within which my doctor gave me to get pregnant had passed, I went to another doctor for a second opinion and what she discovered was that the walls of my cervix was not building up enough to receive any fertilized eggs. Iar menstrual cycle. I felt disillusioned and discouraged that here I am thinking I was close to my goal of having a family when something new suddenly pops up to set me back. I was even thinking why couldn’t my doctor asked me to come in after this six months had elapsed with no pregnancy resulting just to maybe see what new development there was that was still causing me to be unable to get pregnant instead of telling me to consider other alternatives. I felt like I was been tossed overboard out of a ship, to the sharks.
A friend of mine who did surgery in hopes of having a family told me that after her surgery, her doctor told her only God can help her now. I am sure she probably thought nothing of the comment at the time, and her doctor probably had very good intentions in saying this, because in essence, nothing is really wrong with the comment, but in my opinion, it seem a little cold, like he was actually throwing her out of the ship, instead of offering to still monitor her post surgery.
When I had my son, it was only after suffering a agonizing failed labour that I was told that I had an inverted pelvis why attempts at labour had failed (an inverted pelvis is when your pelvis is too narrow to allow for the passage of your baby). I was very perturbed, probably naivity again, thinking could'nt this have been diagnosed earlier saving me, my baby and my family all this anxiety. What if something had happened to me or my child while they were attempting labour. I am still to check with my doctor just to see if they could possibly have known this earlier.
I am someone who encourages people to read up on their conditions so that they will be able to interact with their doctors in an informed manner, but shouldn’t we also expect that our doctors will do what they are supposed to do and willingly give us any vital information we need as well? After all, they are the experts, not us, the patients.
Is it naïve of me to think that we should be able to find doctors who are thorough and who really care about their patients and their needs, who are not profit driven. When I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, when I did my surgery my doctor at the time only told me that if I did not get pregnant within six months of the surgery, I should consider alternatives like invitro-fertilization. Nothing was said to me that the cysts would return or that I will have other issues like heart disease, diabetes or ovarian cancer to think about. Little wonder I left the doctor’s office feeling that all my problems were fixed.
The other doctors I saw, I must say they were not at all bad, but thankfully, one in particular caused me to rethink how I felt overall about doctors. He was so unselfish, so caring and each miscarriage I suffered, he had nothing but encouragement to give. He did not even charge me for some of my visits relating to my miscarriages. I am truly blessed to have met him.
I have been following up on this tragic case where a mother died in child birth due to complications arising from a c-section. The story is so sad. The mother apparently has fibroids and developed a blood clot during surgery. Her husband is saying, the doctors knew her condition and should therefore have been able to prevent it. Why do I feel we are being sold short by our medical system which is put in place to help us when we are sick and save our lives as much as possible. This is why many people spend the time and money for second opinions because you cannot just rely one as this could cost you your life.
Is it that if doctors become who we really want them to be, we could not really pay them to see us. Just wondering.
I am at a lost so some medical personnel please enlighten my naivity. Please do not let me look bad on the world stage. My readers are counting on me.
Until next time, my readers, keep clinging to hope.
