IS YOUR ENVIRONMENT MAKING YOU INFERTILE???

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand
Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

When it comes to infertility/fertility, The more we know, the better off we are in terms of preserving our fertility and treating our infertility. With that said. I am not trying to scare anyone, but do you all know that your environment has a lot to do with your fertility?

While these days we are trying to prevent further damage to our precious environment by trying to adapt to a ‘living green’ lifestyle, which is very good and necessary, but sadly for many people, the damage has already been done, as they were either made to experience much difficulty in trying to conceive children and have the family of their dreams, or sadly, have had to make peace with not being able to have children of their own at all.

It is found that toxic materials, among them, mercury, copper and lead, which is found in our environment in several parts of the world, do have adverse effects on your fertility and can also result in miscarriages, should you become pregnant.

If you have been diagnosed with unexplained infertility, it could be that this is a result of these toxic materials found in your environment.

Below are links to some sites, which speaks in detail to this issue.

http://www.annuaire29.org/articles/category/17/message/340/
http://www.annuaire29.org/articles/category/17/message/334/
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1519933/?page=1

Please read and be encouraged and until next time, keep clinging to hope.

DEALING WITH PREGNANT FRIENDS WHILE STRUGGLING WITH INFERTILITY

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand
Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

For anyone dealing with infertility, it is certain that at some point or another through out your struggle, you will have to deal pregnant friends.

In an earlier post, I spoke about how dealing with babies was one of my greatest difficulty while struggling with infertility. Well, dealing with pregnant friends was right up there with dealing with babies for me.

I remember a very good friend of mine became pregnant and when I heard, I cried myself to sleep. Of course I was as happy as I could have been then, for her, but I was also devastated because I was married a couple of years before her and as the time came that I expected her to start her family, I started picturing both of us being pregnant and our children growing up together.

I remember beginning to feel afraid and helpless, as I began thinking that our relationship would surely be affected by this, because we were very close and saw each other a lot and the sight of her from there on, would be a constant reminder of what I wanted so much, to become pregnant, to be a mother.

While she was going through her early pregnancy symptoms, I remember her visiting and later said to me, “Marie, I feel so sick, you would never understand.” I do not know why I was so upset to hear her say this, and I knew she did not mean to upset me in any way, but I was, and immediately snapped back at her in my mind, “of course I do not understand, I have never been pregnant, don't rub it in girl.”

As her pregnancy progressed, I noticed that our relationship became more and more strained, so much so that when she had her baby, I did not hear from her or her family, I heard by the way. I wanted to feel sad about this, but I could not because this was really my fault, I had pulled away from my friend because I could not deal with her pregnancy. I went to visit her in the hospital, even though I was feeling ashamed and guilty and vowed that I would make up for the time our friendship had lost.

I was later named one of the godparents for her child and I remember declining at first, because I thought I did not deserve it.

When I became pregnant in 2005, another of my good friends became pregnant as well. I was really excited because now I finally had a friend to share this wonderful journey with. I was due June 2006 and she was due July 2006.

Sadly I lost mine and she went on to have hers. She visited me several times before she gave birth and this was difficult for me to say the least, because as you can well imagine she now became a constant reminder of my horrible loss. I was thrown a shower before I knew I would have lost my pregnancy and I reluctantly share some of the gifts I had received with her. I remember when she left with the things, I cried, because I felt I was taking something away from the memory of my pregnancy, from the memory of my daughter, and it was just still too fresh.

I remember telling her when she was about to go into the hospital to have her baby, that I did not think I could deal with visiting a maternity ward when I had just lost my baby. She was very understanding, but I could still see the disappointment in her face. Then the call came that she had the baby, but the baby was immediately taken to the nursery without her seeing him. She also told me that she was bleeding profusely and they were not able to stop it. I remember beginning to cry and started thinking, wow, I cannot lose my friend, I cannot go through another loss, no, not so soon. I was also very concerned for her baby because I know that when they take your baby so suddenly without you seeing them first, something is wrong.

Before I knew it, I was at the hospital and at that time I was not at all concerned with my own discomfort and grief, my friend needed me and I had to be there.

They soon were able to control her bleeding and we later learnt that the baby was born with some breathing and brain problems. He had to spend some time in the hospital but he is three years old now and doing just fine, being any typical boy of his age.

This was when I believe my healing from the loss of my baby actually took a turn for the better, because here I was reaching out to someone, (who was in jeopardy of losing everything, her life and her child), and this instantly caused my own pain to become pale in comparison.

I know many of you would do this for your friend as well, so even though you might be having difficulties dealing with their pregnancies, be encouraged because if your friends should ever need you at anytime throughout their pregnancy, you will be there for them without even thinking about your own misery.

Below is a link with recommendations, which I think could help you deal with pregnant friends as you struggle with infertility. Read and be encouraged and until next time, keep clinging to hope.

http://ldsinfertility.blogspot.com/2010/01/how-to-cope-with-pregnant-friends.html

IS IT WORTH IT?…………OFCOURSE IT IS!!!!!

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand
Psalm 127: 3 & 4

"HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

I was reading a blog on my reading list the other day and the author mentioned that someone was questioning the fact, if it is worth it, after struggling with infertility and having a baby. The author of the blog, who had her brush with infertility as well, seemed quite taken aback and I was too and could even go further to say that she is a little bit ungrateful.

Her reason for thinking this surrounds the fact that she complains of being tired all the time from sleep deprivation, resulting in bags under her eyes, depression among other issues that she is facing, following the birth of her baby.

I hit the rewind button and played back my own experience in this regard, and could clearly see what could have driven her to b asking this question. I had my son through C-section and when I awoke from surgery and realized that I could not move, I immediately thought, wow, this is sure not going to work. How am I supposed to be able to take care of a helpless infant in this condition? Soon after my caregivers were telling me that I had to try and move sooner than later, so that I can begin to care for my baby. I thought to myself, are these people serious, does any of them even know the pain associated with a C-section. How am I going to take care of someone when I need someone to take care of me? It was very difficult to say the least, and it sure did not end there.

When we took our son home, we wondered when he would ever sleep through the night. We swaddle him, we fed him, we did everything we could to make him comfortable but he would still wake up every hour on the hour and very soon the bags under my eyes were big enough to become our baby’s diaper bags. I thought to myself, why did all these people who profess to be my friends and those who are my family did not tell me all that there was to expect? Why did they hide some details from me?

No one told me that I would be anxious and irritable and that my dear husband would be the one that this is taken out on. (He is a darling though, because he took it all so humbly and this is one of the reasons I love him so much). Then one day, it became clear to me. Not because I had struggled with infertility for so long would I have a easier task of taking care of a newborn. All parents go through this initially, until the baby settles into life outside of the womb, that they have been used to for all these months. No wonder some go past their due dates, because obviously they are very comfortable in there.

All that I am saying is, I could easily have asked the same question that this person asked, ‘is it worth it?’ and I am pretty sure, the thought must have crossed my mind during my most vulnerable moments, but I certainly did not want to anger God by letting him feel that I was ungrateful. It soon became clear to me though, every time I held my son in my arms and realized that it is not a dream, he is actually there, every time he looked into my eyes and I looked into his and for the fact that I had triumphed over more than a decade long of struggling with infertility, how could it be anything else but worth it?

I do hope this person gets a chance soon to experience these moments, to realize that she is indeed privileged and blessed to have overcome infertility, because so many are still struggling and so many still might not even hold a baby of their own in their arms. I sure hope she realizes soon how worth it all her struggles with infertility were and I do hope that I am encouraging those of you who might find yourself asking this question soon.

Be encouraged therefore, and until next time, keep clinging to hope.