I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I FIND MYSELF ON THIS ROAD AGAIN!!!!!

hildren are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

Children born to a young man are like sharp arrows in a warrior’s hand

Psalm 127: 3 and 4

“HOPE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE"

Three years ago, after giving birth to my son, if anyone ever told me that I would be in the position of watching others get pregnant with their second child, and wondering if there will be a second one for me, I would hasten to tell them they were fibbing. I say this because my thought at that time, was that I was over and done with infertility.

There were four of us who were pregnant and the same time and now most are on the way with their second child and once again I am here with mixed feelings.  I am happy for them, but a little bit jealous that I am not once again sharing this precious journey with them.

I am trying to console myself by thinking that I am far older than these ladies, and also carrying around far less eggs, which is further complicated by PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and so there definitely odds against me. This is so far working, but at times I am reminded that life is so not fair.

I am so grateful to God for my son, and I know many of you who are struggling to have even one child, is probably thinking that I am being a bit ungrateful.  That is alright because I have said that about persons as well, during my struggles with infertility, and currently I do feel that way as well, but there are indeed times when I look at my son and want for him what I had in such abundance as a child, siblings to grow up and interact with. It is my personal opinion that a part of a child is missing when they do not have such opportunity, as I do believe this is a big part of who we become as adults.

We are not giving up hope though, we will continue trying and if no stork turns up, we will actively pursue adoption, as this has been in our plans for a while, having made the decision that our son will not go through life alone.